Open when I've gone to a better life (last post for now)

Atleast shell be happy she'll be happy either way without me so will her and my mom. and then I'll be free from it all' free from feeling terrible all the time free from making people mad or upest free from hurting people I care about free from the guilt of making people I love depressed and any pain free from losing people I love till then I hide this feeling till the sickness K1lls me or I done it just to make them happy again.