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Taekwondo rant/vent

h0ly-b00k-0f-li3s • Mar 04, 2026 @ 8:33am

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For context, I have three instructors: one woman and two boys. The woman is the second senior instructor. My master is never there except on Mondays. So last night, I was thinking about the essay I have to write for my green belt. I’m not very confident in what I do most of the time, so I brought it up to my instructor while he was teaching me my form. I told him that I’m dyslexic and have issues with writing. Then he started talking about his personal life, which I won’t share, and it led to him saying that he understands it’s a spectrum and a disability, but that he believes in me and knows I can do it. I told him I know I can do it too, it’s just self-esteem issues I have with myself. He said, “I know you’re not confident in your form. I can see it in the way you recoiled every time we said you did well on it.” I can take criticism; I don’t start crying because of that. It’s when I get into my own head that I start having panic attacks and feel like I’m going to cry, or I just start crying. Then my instructor kind of looked at me while we were talking about demo teams, like she didn’t really want me to go, and I said, “I’ve been in chorus before. I know that feeling of everything needing to be perfect, if you’re not on the right pitch, you’re not doing it right.” Sorry if this was too long T~T

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